Baptism by Whitman

"...Most of the great poets are impersonal. I am personal...in my poems, all revolves around, concentrates in, radiates from myself. I have but one central figure, the general human personality typified in myself. But my book compels, absolutely necessitates every reader to transpose himself or herself into the central position and become the living fountain, actor, experiencer, himself or herself, of every page, every aspiration, every line."

I copied Walt Whitman's words into my journal from my 1993, Modern Library edition of Leaves of Grass on February 19th, 2001, adding my own commentary: This is why I love Whitman, he writes poetry meant to personally interpreted, to me there is no other way. I think I may have been a romantic era poet in another life, they understand me well, especially Whitman. I had recently procured said edition as a Valentine from my high school sweetheart, who inscribed "O Erin, My Erin, you are simply the most wonderful person I know" on the inside of the front cover. For the three months we had been dating he had heard nothing but Whitman this and Whitman that. I was introduced to the poet by my friend, Jill, and shortly thereafter read "A Noiseless Patient Spider" as an assignment for Mr. Connolly's junior, Advanced Language Arts class.

I poured over my Modern Library edition with the attentiveness of a little boy who had just received a new set of legos. I looked up words I didn't know and picked out favorite poems, reading them aloud to an imaginary audience in the solace of my bedroom. I loved the way the words sounded as they rolled off my tongue:

“Unfix’d yet fix’d
Ever have been, ever shall be and are,
Sweeping the present to the infinite future,
Eidolons, eidolons, eidolons.”

Mostly, I loved the inclusivity of his language, always "himself or herself," every walk of life was acknowledged and no experience dismissed.

Jill and I began a weekly ritual, we would both pick out a poem to memorize and recite at our usual, Friday night sleepover. We sat on the old navy and green area rug in her basement bedroom with pretzel sticks, carob chips, and some ghastly mixture of clear liquors that we called "vogin" between us.

"Alright," Jill began, "take a shot of this," she poured the mixture into two Dixie cups from next to her bathroom sink.

"A toast," I offer, raising my Dixie cup, "to words, written to be read. And to friends." We clinked cardboard cups and drank the vodka/gin hybrid, wiggling and making faces as we swallowed and then dissolving into giggles over the mischief we had gotten into.

"Okay, okay,” I begin, “this week, for the Jill and Erin Poetry Recital, I have memorized Walt Whitman's "Starting from Paumanok, 19":

O Camerado Close! O you and me at last, and us two only.
O a word to clear one's path ahead endlessly!
O something ecstatic and undemonstrable! O music wild!
O now I triumph- and you shall also;
O hand in hand- O wholesome pleasure-O one more
Desirer and lover!
O to haste firm holding- to haste, haste on with me.

I recited the words of my favorite poem with delight. The romance and excitement I felt at falling in love, with this poem, with the world around me, with my friends and the limitless possibilities that life held. How was he able to describe the ineffable quality of human feeling with human words?

The more I read, the more enamored I became; I even sort of had a crush on him. I imagined that I would meet him in the afterlife and wrote my own poems seeking his approval. Upon reading, "Once I passed Through a Populous City,” I wrote my own version:

To live in this great city
Anonymous to everyone but you
Is the most comfortable dream I’ve ever had

To lie silent with your hand on my stomach
As cars and life pass below
Forgetting time and existence

To open the windows and doors
Bare against the cold, wood floor
Talking about our lives outside this little room.

To let you know me fully
So that I may live without reservation
And be anonymous to everyone but you.

Walt became a giver of sage advice and a role model for broad-mindedness in the Lily-white community I was raised in. I spread the word of Whitman to my artsier friends. Lydia and I read "In Louisiana I Saw a Live Oak Growing" on the roof of her parent’s farm house and I analyzed "To You" with Matt Wilson while waiting in the wings of the high school auditorium at rehearsal for Much Ado About Nothing. Leaves of Grass was a companion reader to my young life, spurring me to see the beauty in my surroundings and to find romance in the most mundane of events. I found the Whitman quote "a mouse is miracle enough to stagger quintillions of infidels," and suddenly the grass became greener, my little sister became cooler, even algebra was interesting on Whitman. He had brought me to the Promised Land; it really was the little things in life after all.

Though my enthusiasm has been tempered, my love of Walt Whitman and the steady ability of Leaves of Grass to impact my life, as I grow older, has remained unchanged. As I read on, new poems strike my fancy and the old favorites have become comforting friends, reminding me to continue finding beauty in the small things and to record my discoveries with as much love as Walt did his own leaves of grass.

Loyally Divided

I first encountered Chicago band, The Loyal Divide, on a sub-zero night in mid-January. Accustomed to seeing many local acts that feature talented hipsters producing watered down "indie rock," I walked into Subterranean expecting more of the same.

I situated myself in the balcony, looking down on the stage. I was prepared to listen and digest, coolly, from afar. As the band took the stage my aloof demeanor quickly morphed into a haunting, electro-rock trance. I could not keep myself from dancing. The Loyal Divide rocked the stage, performing their music with so much passion and desire it seemed as if they were playing for their lives and the energy was contagious. I danced in the near empty balcony for the entire set and wanted more when they finished.

After 7 years of playing together, The Loyal Divide's live show rivals larger name national acts and listening to their live and recorded work, one gets a very clear sense of their influences. Artists such as Modest Mouse, Prince, Radiohead, and Animal Collective, can be heard loud and clear in both the 1st and 2nd EPs, yet the boys of TLD bring something unique to the table: they are the music of Generation Y. Taking their queue from the contemporary greats, TLD combines talent with innovation. Using mixers and keys, hearty rock n' roll bass lines, brass interludes, and a playful falsetto lead vocal, these boys are on to something.

Upon arriving home after this introduction at Subterranean, I immediately downloaded the EPs from iTunes. Their freshman effort, The Loyal Divide, is a valiant premiere, songs like "Tease" and "Lights" are a bit too literal in terms of influence, but are still catchy and complex. And the most recent EP, Labrador, shows an obvious progression toward the cultivation of a signature sound for the band, as the music continues to grow more rich in it's complexity, "Vision Vision" is sexy & full of angst and "Young Blades" feels like a mechanical, macabre song from a Bollywood musical.

Later in the month, I met with The Loyal Divide before their show with Ultrasonik Edukators at Schuba's. Chris Sadek, the co-front man, is the first one there. We sit and talk over a beer while the rest of his band mates trickle in. The guys are warm, self-deprecating, and funny. We discuss the struggles of having to work day jobs that stifle and keep us from our true work, we talk about the direction of music and the direction of our country in to the 21st century. Originally from Ohio, percussionist Andrew McCarthy tells the story of how they became a band at Miami University of Ohio, traveled to Columbus after most of the band had graduated and began to learn the practical aspects of being artists, he says "We were trying to find ourselves, or what we thought we wanted to be and reconcile the artistic with the practical sides of being a band. I think the eventual goal for us is to be able to make music full time."

After having success in Columbus and releasing their first EP, it seemed time for The Loyal Divide to gain more exposure than Ohio could offer, so they packed up and moved to Sadek's hometown, Chicago! "It was between Chicago and New York" they tell me, "we picked Chicago because it was the most affordable to live in and Chris already knew his way around the local venues." Upon arrival the band quickly booked gigs at some of Chicago's best, garage venues including Elbo Room, The Kinetic Playground, Schubas, and The Empy Bottle.

All of the members of TLD are happy to admit that the move to Chicago took them out of their comfort zone and has had it's ups and downs. Adam Johnson, guitarist and songwriter of TLD laments the commute and talks about how riding the bus has inspired him to write more trance and dance music. This is what he himself listens to to drown out the city noise. "I don't feel the same emotional connection to songs as I used to. When I hear something I am analyzing it, deconstructing the layers. I think a lot of my approach to songwriting comes from a more intellectual standpoint now, putting together a song that is more than just writing guitar riffs and bass lines takes a lot of thought and planning."

Loyal Divide talks of their night-owl qualities, holing up in their Lakeview Practice space for hours after work, writing, practicing, and producing their oeuvre. It seems that the band actually is playing for their lives. I was reminded of the famous Rainer Maria Rilke quote from Letters to a Young Poet, " ask yourself in the most silent hour of your night: must I write? Dig into yourself for a deep answer. And if this answer rings out in assent, if you meet this solemn question with a strong, simple "I must," then build your life in accordance with this necessity; your whole life, even into its humblest and most indifferent hour, must become a sign and witness to this impulse." To Loyal Divide, making music is not a choice-they MUST create. And upon meeting them it is easy to see that their lives are a testament to their music.

As for the future of Loyal Divide, much is on the horizon. Beyond the ever growing crowds at their local gigs, they played Lovejoy's in Austin, TX on March 19th during SXSW, and on April 11th TLD will take the stage at the Congress Theatre, opening for Deadmau5, Late of the Pier, Crookers, and The Whip in the first concert of the Branded Series (www.branded-up.com). Is there another EP on the horizon? The band is always working, and I for one can't wait to hear what the Loyal Divide comes up with next.

Ready The Destroyer's 1st EP "Through This Night"

Upon first listen to Chicago indie/punk band, Ready The Destroyer's freshman EP- "Through This Night" I was immediately reminded of the now overdone riffs of the Blink 182/Weezer influenced, garage bands of my youth. The gritty sound and distortion of the guitars and the simplicity of a three piece band and some angsty lyrics brought me back to the days of jumping up and down in the front row of a friend's coffee shop gig.

As the album progresses however, the nostalgia begins to wear thin and songs such as "Lifeline" and "The Cut" rely too heavily on recent popular music by bands like Bloc Party and Fall Out Boy. Ready The Destroyer lead vocalist and songwriter, Neill Miller's singing seems affectedly flat and malcontent. On the track "Anew" Miller sings "nothing's ever started, nothing ever ends, just spare me the bad feeling." These, like most of the lyrics on this album are overwrought with specious depth that leave the listener unable to attach meaning to these songs.

Though there are moments when the music seems to hint at complexity and originality, most of the tracks sound like copies of their more well-known punk predecessors. "Through This Night" begins with a dark-pop feel and descends into a heavy, overly distorted hole where one song is not distinguishable from another.

Though a valiant first attempt, Ready The Destroyer has yet to carve out a sound that is unique enough to stand up to their local and national contemporaries. "Through This Night" is available at their website www.readythedestroyer.com, and they can be caught live at the Double Door at 10pm on March 25th.

(published 3/10/08 @ www.thedelimagazine.com/chicago)

Concert Review: Loyal Divide @ Subterranean

One needn't look any further than the blogosphere to find rave reviews of The Loyal Divide, a Columbus, OH turned Chicago band that has been compared to Animal Collective, Brian Eno, and Modest Mouse. Living up to a reputation as big as these indie/psychadelic predecessors is no small task, but as a spectator at Wednesday night's show at Subterranean, there can be no doubt-The Loyal Divide not only lived up to their criticism but exceeded expectations by putting on a show that was as aesthetically pleasing as it was an aural delight.

Using mixers, synthesizers, keyboards, and a trumpet, as well as the more traditional rock n' roll instruments, The Loyal Divide is cultivating a uniquely 21st century sound. The title track of their first E.P. "Labrador," sounds as if it could slide right between "15 steps" and "Bodysnatchers" on Radiohead's 2007 release, "In Rainbows." Beyond obvious nods to Radiohead, listeners can hear The Talking Heads, Kraftwerk, and Prince among other influences.

Nevermind comparisons, The Loyal Divide has their own brand of cool. All 5 members rocked hard on Wednesday night, despite sub-zero temperatures, with sometimes spastic and always rhythmic undulations. The boys of TLD had Subterranean moving to the music, and aside from a few local, rock-god style mishaps (i.e. broken guitar strings, and speaker feed back) the show was a success. Though their songs are intense, the electro beats and spot-on percussion inspired the crowd to more action than your standard, hipster head-bob.

Whether The Loyal Divide likes it or not, they are soon to be a band on the map. With the release of their first EP, "Labrador," and more shows on the schedule Chicagoans and Ohio natives alike are sure to be saying "we saw them when."

Check them out later this month at Schuba's on January 30th at 8pm.

(published on 1/16/09 @ www.thedelimagazine.com/chicago)

Interview with Fake Fictions

When first heard, the name of Chicago Band, "The Fake Fictions," may seem to be just another cleverly redundant, hipster "in joke," though actually with their throaty base-lines and punky chord progressions they are exploring "issues of authenticity and falseness" in guitarist Nick Ammerman's words. Evident in their poetry, The Fake Fictions are seeking answers. Like any bunch of twenty-somethings in this day and age they ponder ways to self-fulfillment, the ramifications of American Capitalism, and the effects of drinking the office coffee.

Though their most recent, full length album "Krakatoa" was meant to mimic their live experience more closely than previous efforts, I was happy to hear a much fuller sound at the Empty Bottle last evening than the production of Krakatoa gives them credit for. Sarah Ammerman's bass skills made the show with drummer Ben Bilow and guitarist Nick complementing her to make music that sounded like the marriage of Pony Up! and Green Day.

As far as small venue shows go, this was not the rowdiest I've been to, but the raw complexity of The Fake Fictions performance had my toe tapping and head bobbing. They have definitely filled a gap in the illusive "Chicago Sound" with their true, power-pop quality.

Fortunately, I had a chance to do some emailing with Nick and Sarah, the husband and wife front people of The Fake Fictions, to get their take on the Chicago scene, Craigslist, and the coming holiday season:

The Deli: So, what spurred you and Sarah to move to Chicago from the East Coast? How do you find the Mid-west?

NICK: Uh well we were living in Richmond, Va., which is cheap and pretty and kind of culturally stagnant, unless you really really love hardcore music. And we realized we were young and free and didn't have anything keeping us there so we visited some cities to check them out and obviously Chicago was the best so we moved here.

I am a big fan of the Midwest. The countryside is verdant and the cities always have cool old industrial areas with giant brick warehouses and grown-over train tracks. The people seem very comfortable in their bodies.

SARAH: It's friendly, and the streets are paved with cheese.

TD:You found Ben under a rock says your website, other sources cite craigslist as the source of your percussionist. What is the best thing, other than your drummer that you have found on the list of Craig?

SARAH: Nick, didn't you find your guitar there?

NICK: No, I bought my guitar at a real store.

TD: The Fake Fictions have become quite successful on the Chicago scene despite the rather major set-back of your practice space catching on fire, the infamous impetus for Krakatoa. What do you attribute the success of The Fake Fictions to as opposed to previous bands you've been involved in? Is there anything specific to the Chicago scene that makes it easier to be a band on the rise?

NICK: Defining musical success by how many people come to your shows or how many CDs you sell seems like a recipe for a painful ulcer, crippling self-doubt, and eventual suicide. So the Fake Fictions are as successful as every band I've every been in, because I define success as writing interesting songs, playing interesting shows, meeting interesting people, and having fun. Of course, I have only managed to develop this positive attitude as psychological protection from years of playing shows to ten people and having closets full of unsold albums.

SARAH: I like to think of all these bands as creative projects, and in that sense they were all successful, but I guess this time around we have more time on our hands. No one is going away any time soon. We have fun, we're flexible, and there's always a place to play.

TD: Not going to lie, the thing that originally drew me to The Fake Fictions was the name of the band. It called to my literary geek-dom. I find that some bands use their name as a sort of mission statement, a way to sum up what they are all about creatively in a word or a phrase. Is there any such meaning behind The Fake Fictions? How did you decide on it? Any other names you tried on that you are willing to divulge?

NICK: The band name was chosen through a stringent vetting policy similar to that used for high-powered political appointees. We were trying to project an image of extreme intelligence and corresponding pompousness. Uh also we like books. Interestingly a lot of our songs are about issues of authenticity and falseness; it's a pervasive topic in our oeuvre.

The only name I remember that was rejected was the Glittering Prizes, after a Television Personalities song, and the reason I remember it is that it was my idea and I was pushing for it really hard and I'm still bitter about it being rejected by the other band members.

TD: The band's sound has definitely evolved over the past four years, moving from a slightly more saccharine pop to something more gritty but undoubtedly catchy on Krakatoa. Assuming that you will be safe from any pyrotechnics in the coming years what creative direction do you see the band heading in? What interests you about music and being a musician in 2008 and beyond?

NICK: This is a timely question, as we have just finished recording an EP of our more recent songs with our pal Max Brooks, which we plan to put online for free, hopefully before the end of the year. What this means is that we are at a convenient point to reassess where we are and what we would like to accomplish in the coming fiscal periods. It's a time of reflection. From my personal standpoint, I would like to further develop and exhibit my fiery and innovative guitar playing. So look for less "chords" and more "riffs." I would also like our songwriting to make people more uncomfortable.

SARAH: I think we'll always be musicians in one way or another, but it's definitely an exciting time right now, in our own lives and in the world around us.

TD:What is your favorite venue to play in Chicago?

NICK: We like playing quasilegal art spaces, galleries, tiny bars with no stage and a cheap PA ... basically any venue that does not employ a sound guy or require sound checks. We like to keep things informal and interesting. If you own a garage, an authentic diner, an independent shoe store, or a houseboat and you want to host a rock show, please get in touch.

TD: What is your favorite venue to see a concert at in Chicago?

SARAH: Empty Bottle.

TD: What is your favorite Thanksgiving dinner side dish?

SARAH: Sweet potato casserole.

NICK: Cranberry sauce, but only the kind that you get out of the can that retains the shape of the can. Not the kind with "cranberries" in it.

TD:How do you feel about people who already have their Christmas decorations up on November 19th?

NICK: Ambivalent.

SARAH: It's super.

(published 11/21/08 @ www.thedelimagazine.com/chicago)

Anathallo's "Canopy Glow": A Lesson in Feeling Infinite

In Stephen Chbosky's coming of age novel, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, he describes feeling "infinite" as driving fast through a tunnel while listening to Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide" and letting out joyous screams. A feeling so happy that you might be able live forever, or die in that moment fulfilled. While Stevie Nix's melancholy crooning doesn't immediately bring to mind the sheer joy associated with feeling "infinite," Anathallo's latest album, "Canopy Glow" could be the soundtrack for infinity.

The 7 member ensemble are Chicago transplants by way of a little, college town called Mt. Pleasant in central Michigan. Founded by Matthew Joynt in 2000, Anathallo saw its beginnings in Grand Rapids coffee shops and other small venues, eventually spreading their multi-instrumental, story-telling anthems throughout the entire country. In 2006 Anathallo released its first full-length album, "Floating World", to much critical acclaim and much commentary on their use of Glockenspiels. "Floating World" wielded invitations to Coachella and Lollapalooza in 2006 and spurred the group to join us permanently in the Windy City in 2007. Since moving to Chicago the band has booked European and Japanese tours and are anticipating the release of their second album, the aforementioned "Canopy Glow."

Oft compared to Sufjan Stevens and The Arcade fire, the folk-pop of Anathallo is unique in its intellect. "Canopy Glow" finds the band exploring humanity's role in nature, animalism, and ceremony. The septuplet's whimsical aesthetic and barrage of ancillary percussion brings you to the fields to gaze at the "Northern Lights" in a velvet black night, it lets you hear the trickling brook in "The River," and feel the weight of hibernation on "Sleeping Torpor." Perhaps the most compelling aspect of Anathallo's sophomore effort is its devotion to the namesake of the band, a Greek word meaning "to renew, refresh or bloom again." Tracks such as "Tower of Babel," "Cafetorium," and "Noni's Field" speak to death, baptism, and rebirth through optimistic voices, upbeat horns, and dancing strings.

As we look to the beginning of another holiday season and the end of another year; as we witness the fading of any trace of summer in Chicago and surrender to the enveloping darkness of winter, Anathallo's "Canopy Glow" meets us at the crux and reminds us that death and rebirth are unavoidable aspects of nature's un-ending cycle. It reminds us that we can run East to our beaches on a dark night, when the horizon can only be found where the sand meets the water and feel the sheer joy of being infinite.

"Canopy Glow" will be released through Anticon Records on November 18th.

(published on 11/18/08 at www.thedelimagazine.com/chicago)